Ruidoso = Leah’s roots.

I was driving back to the downs (named such for the horse race track) and a moment of clarity regarding my roots came about. I was returning from a hike in the woods with my mom and ruby (who is amazing) in which we searched for pine knots (full of sap so they burn better and more fragrant) and pretended to be tall pine trees, swaying in the wind (ruby was the best at this). We collected enough to barely carry back to the cars. After our adventure I played 9 holes of disc golf with one of my best friends, his gf and dad amidst the trees and vegetation we grew up roaming through. And this is what launched my roots thoughts. Some of my roots I have prayed to be like that of the Enset tree in Ethiopia, so shallow that the tree is easily uprooted and therefore these habits or family traits won’t be part of my story forever (we all have a list I’m sure). Other roots I imagine weaving together, deep into the ground and anchored among rocks so massive that my life will forever represent these traits and traditions.

Roaming through the forest with my mom and Ruby reminded me of when I was Ruby’s age and my parents took us along while they cut wood for the winter. My older two siblings and I would be left to create a world where each tree bore fruit to be used in a potion or soup we might all imbibe, rationed of course, since we were castaway children left to fend for ourselves (imagination of a child… why did we always want to be orphans?). We created a world in the great outdoors and hours later we’d all pile into my dad’s truck and return home. Those are the roots that are still thriving as Ruby and I pretended to be trees in the wind and had to hunt for food before returning to the car. Thank you mom and dad for giving me roots… a stage for my imagination, a love for the high desert wilderness, and a vision for great things amidst simplicity.

from one of my kinder boys:

Thanksgiving is a time when you get together and share love.

yum

Last night Calley and I ran errands then fixed up a quick delicious dinner - sauteed shrimp in butter and garlic (did i mention it was oh so healthy?). Then, this morning we were practically snowed in (then the roads melted and it was only a feat to get from house to car) so I thought I should bake something for breakfast!! We had eggy dutch babies with homemade colorado peach syrup (i accidentally thawed my frozen peaches out yesterday so had to use them) and powdered sugar. Delicious and hearty for the snowy morning. Oh! And my roomie made some hot mulled cider. Winter wasn't so bad this morning. Last but not least, for lunch I steamed kale, cooked brown rice and "borrowed" some goat cheese for a scrumptious lunch - brown rice then kale, drizzled with seasoned rice vinegar and olive oil then topped with chunks of goat cheese.

These are my favorite weekends, those in the kitchen with friends. yum.

juice and my favorite part of the day

I juiced for the staff this morning. We had an abundance of fruits and veg leftover from our food service so I brought the juicer to school this morning. Yum. Some weren't so keen on carrots in liquid form, but carrot/apple is my fave!!


And now for my favorite part of the day: Relay races!
Lunch recess has a tendency to be chaotic, lacking much structure and on Fridays it resembles a war zone. Last week a 3rd grader challenged me to a race to which I responded "lunch recess. black top. be ready." We met on Tuesday for the battle of speed. I barely won. Then a 4th grade girl wanted to race (she beat me. I'm getting old.). Then most of the 4th grade wanted to race. Then there were too many to span the black top so I turned it into a relay - 6 lanes, 4 on a team and 3-4 officials. They loved it. I loved it. I was smiling at recess, which is rare. Good day.

ruby's growing up!

my beautiful little niece is growing up! Look at that contemplative glance.

if you do what you've always done you'll get what you've always gotten

trying a different approach...

boys. man its been a struggle to maintain optimism in a world of heartache and brokenness. God is good and has a plan of redemption for each person He crafted. I shouldn't be shocked when a student has the same last name as his/her parent and sibling(s). I fail. I have treated myself with little respect in the same moment i speak of a hope to be treated better by another person. hard work ahead... discipline, for the hope of something more.

I tried something different and whether a date comes from it or just one day of practicing more respect for myself I think I'll tack it up as a small victory. AND I'm starting a book club with some girl friends. It's easy for conversations with girlfriends to simply settle on the topic of the opposite sex so I'm initiating a book club to encourage each other in other ways - learn new perspectives about each other, read something interesting and nurture more aspects of women than our marryability (just made that up).

Trying new things... with relationships in general.

A wise woman (wendy s.) once told me that there are three things in life - things you can change, things you can influence and things you can do nothing about. Most of our emotional energy is spent on the things we can do nothing about.

I am working on not absorbing. Play tennis v. basketball. Redemption of self rather than my attempt to save the world (i realize God doesn't need my direction as much as I think sometimes). I think this is more useful as well.

Trying something different... with my friend Jesus.

I looked back through pictures during my most "centered" time I can pinpoint. I was doing the pre-major-break-up-life-questioning thing, senior in college, heart aching in a way that God was my life source and therefore pray without ceasing was realistic. My mentor was also my yoga instructor and her husband my boss and they, together, led me through critical moments marked by confidence in Jesus' redemption and providence.

today. i am practicing turning the music/radio off on my way to work and talk to God. I'm working on conversation. I'm going to church. I'm faced with my own inadequacy to conquer current struggles. Again, this is where faith is necessary and I am reaching, reaching and making myself reach for fear of what might come about if I continue to depend on my own strength. I called a few good girl friends and cried, prayed and felt relief for the first time in a while. God is good. He is in the work of redemption... of my heart, lives, and this beautiful place.

you need to watch me

One of our teachers is out so i'm subbing first grade today. One of the little girls, as she's walking into the room, says "Ms. Miller, you need to watch me real close because I might need to go home again today. I've been sick." Thank you for letting me know.

Last night Meg G. and I cleaned out the last of our apartment. I jokingly said it was the end of an era... but it's been a significant year in that little apartment. I went to bed too late after hanging out with my 4 roommates in our big house, laughing at each other (micah sneezed with such enthusiasm I thought he had chopped a finger off. Sarah was beaming with energy none of us knew what to do with. Brandon was stoked on his new baby... a big TV we initiated by watching The Hangover. And, Meg K laughed as Micah freaked and I dished about time with an interesting boy.)

I like the start of year 2. You need to watch me real close because I might... do great things... ask questions without answers... laugh till my cheeks hurt... celebrate friends... cook something delicious... cry over something I'll laugh at later...

I'll watch you real close because you might ____________?