will it be a tiny tim christmas?

Today it feels like winter... like snow is on its way, but maybe just a tease of snow and the brisk weather is really settling in.

I'm exhausted like a little mouse, running through the maze with cheese to be found at the end of several corridors. Cheese is good but does it matter what kind or how much? A little bit of fancy cheese is better than a huge chunk of cheddar, but not the mature cheddar. I could go on, but basically I am making some decisions about my professional future in a time that is less than ideal to be unemployed. I just called my grandmother, a woman I respect, but avoid in relation to the current economic crisis or that of Y2K. I am hopeful, maybe unrealistic, and she is recommending I read Ezekiel because we are most definitely facing a doomsday situation in the coming months. I know things will get bad and our generation has no grid for the environment of a depression or even crisis of this nature but is it really time to stock up on enough canned goods to last a few months? Am I naive and my grandmother is spot on? Either way I know I am one of thousands looking for work, wrestling with the question of "Take ANY job bc they're hard to come by or hold out for something fulfilling?"

I kicked myself several times for coming back from London and going right back into the restaurant business. It was easy. I love Aaron, my boss and bff, but he knows its not the career-launching job. When I coached the volleyball team this summer I was surprised at how much energy I had to devote. I want that opportunity, one that utilizes me. I need to set my sights higher, not to the "easy" move into a restaurant mgmt position. I need money so I may serve, cocktail or bartend (shhhh...don't tell grandmother... she's not a fan of alcohol) until this said job comes together, but out of respect for myself and my potential I have decided to hold out. This may be stupid if the world comes crashing down next week and I've held on to my unemployment for the sake of my ideals but we shall see.